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3 Dating Mistakes Women Make After Divorce

when we begin dating after a divorce

there's mistakes we make and it's not

uncommon to hear women especially say

there's no good guys out there like I've

been single now for six months or a year

and I still can't find anybody that is

worthwhile to date you know there's

three mistakes that I see particularly

often in my clinical practice that women

make after they divorce when they start

dating again

I'd like to go through those three

because I think it will really help you

it maybe caused you to stop and think

and then redo or reset what your goals

are the first one is thinking all men

are the same because of your ex okay

first of all all men are not the same

but when you purposely put in your

profile no head games or honest men

apply only things like that the person

answering that are looking at that

already knows that you have an edge

there that you've been hurt or if you're

out and you're enjoying part of the

conversation but all of a sudden they

say something and you overanalyze it or

jump on them they know that and it kind

of causes them to step back it scares

people because it's obvious that you

haven't dealt with what you need to deal

with the second one is a rebound

relationship it's very common for

everyone who has been through a divorce

or a breakup to get involved with

someone on a rebound that's not wise

after a divorce and the reason is you'll

be doubly hurt and it sets in that

mindset that every man cheats or every

man is irresponsible

or whatever happened in your first

relationship it also sets a bad

precedent for you because you start

devaluing maybe even disrespecting

yourself no longer trusting yourself and

trusting yourself is the first person

you need to trust in a relationship

going forward before you jump into bed

with someone

or into a relationship ask yourself are

you happy alone do you just want a warm

body for the night are you looking to

feel better about yourself

is there some other way to get this need

met without involving another person I

think many times we're irrational and we

hurt so bad we jump into something too

quickly with someone else not thinking

where it will go and many times it

sabotages our own progress and not only

that but someone who doesn't have your

best interests at heart is going to just

make it even worse and harder to get

over this and then to move on and lastly

unintentionally just hanging on to old

baggage we all have baggage and people

who have been married before have

baggage and so do single people what's

important is that you deal you resolve

with the issues of your past

relationship if you divorce you really

should not be dating again for at least

a year and even then I wouldn't jump

into a relationship the reason is

because you're not ready a divorce is a

powerful hurtful thing it's it gets in

you when you marry someone just taking

that course of action does something to

the way you think about yourself sets of

vision for the future and unman tling

that is very difficult you can do it in

the court system but working through it

and resolving it but most importantly

coming up with your part of why it broke

up no longer blaming the other person

but rather standing up and saying maybe

if I had done this differently it won't

have turned out this way or maybe from

the beginning if I had respected myself

and asserted myself more it would have

had a different ending when we owned our

part in any failure whether it be a

breakup a divorce or whatever we feel we

fail that then we give our cell

the power to make a change so it doesn't

doesn't happen again and that's why it's

so important I hope this helps you going

forward it is difficult and it is

painful but that's okay some of the

biggest deals in life some of the

biggest processes you go through are

like that you end up learning from the

pain