What are the true signs that your marriage is over?
What are the signs that your marriage is not worth fighting for?
Welcome to HAPPILY COMMITTED
My name is Coach Adrian and I've dedicated my life helping people find
happiness in their relationships. For a long time I helped people recover after
break-up, separation, and divorces and now I'm focusing more on helping people
create the relationship they want and to truly thrive in their relationship in
order to avoid a breakup or a separation because I know how devastating it can be
for both parties. And unfortunately sometimes a marriage is coming to an end.
And I wanted to discuss the true signs that this is the end so that you know
where you stand and you're not fighting in vain for a relationship that is quite
frankly not worth fighting for.
The first sign that your marriage is over is when your partner is unable to
stop putting their needs at your expense, even after you've communicated and try
to rebuild a healthier marriage and connection in the relationship, if their
happiness constantly comes at your expense and you are feeling worse, you're
feeling overwhelmed, and quite frankly only one person is existing in that
relationship, the marriage is coming to an end.
Ultimately a relationship or marriage will be unbalanced if only one person is
happy and that happiness comes and the others person's expense. So if you can
relate to this it is probably a clear true sign that your marriage is over.
The second sign that a marriage is over is when you can't seem to find a way to
get out of the blame mode or the blame game and it's quite common for people to
argue to fight to bicker and to criticise in any relationship because we
have a tendency of getting frustrated and it's a lot easier to blame someone
else than to take accountability for our actions. But when after years and years,
weeks after week, day after day, you are criticizing and blaming the other
person's for your happiness and you are re litigating past fights and living in
the past it is a sign that your marriage is over.
The third sign that I've seen that indicated to me as a coach that my
clients marriage was over is when one or the other party cannot seem to find any
goodness in the other. And it's sad but I've seen this. I see this quite a lot
towards the end of relationships or marriages where people are so consumed
by their resentment their anger and they start to despise their significant other
and they cannot even see one quality trait or attribute. And that
unfortunately is very sad because clearly even though you may not be at a
point where you can connect with each other, your partner has good qualities.
They must. Because you fell for in love with them and because all human beings
have a tendency to have good qualities. Unless of course you're in a toxic
relationship or you're married to a sociopath. So if you cannot see any good
in the man or the woman that you're with that is a clear sign that your marriage
Another sign that your marriage is over is when your partner seeks to cut you
off from your friends and your family, from the things that you love to do. And
that extreme controlling behavior is a sign of toxicity and it's a sign that
you need to make sure that you are aware of what's going on and that you're able
to establish clear boundaries otherwise you're gonna find yourself in a downward
spiral very quickly.
Ultimately if you or your partner are unwilling to change, if you or your
partner think that the other person is the only issue, it's a sign that your
marriage is over because a relationship or a marriage is
like a garden that needs to be constantly and continuously nurtured and
attended to. And when one person gives up the garden will grow weeds and
unfortunately it is impossible to be in a relationship where both parties are
not actively seeking to make it work. And we don't take divorce lightly. We are
HAPPILY COMMITTED we want to make sure that no stone is left unturned, that
everything is done before pulling the trigger because divorce is seldom not
the right option for many people and in one of my previous videos I talked about
the divorce rate but the rate of second divorces is even higher. It's at 67% and
the rate of a third divorce is even higher at 74% so I'm not trying to scare
you and in some cases divorce is the only way but quite frankly we are
HAPPILY COMMITTED and we want to make sure that everything is done in order to
help you make sound decisions and to maximize your chances of being in a
fulfilling healthy relationship with your spouse. If you've enjoyed this video
please join the HAPPILY COMMITTED movement. Like it, subscribe to our
channel, check out our blog and check out our programs and the resources that we
offer and really truly engage because we are trying to create a community of
happy couples that are bound together and across the world and that are
fighting the good fight to try to make this world better and to try to make
human relationships more fulfilling. So thank you for tuning in and see you soon
for another video